Meet the only guy who changes his identity more often than his underwear.

Irwin “Fletch” Fletcher: Chevy Chase, Chief Karlin: Joe Don Baker, Gail Stanwyk: Dana Wheeler-Nicholson, ‘Frank’ Walker: Richard Libertini, Alan Stanwyk: Tim Matheson, Larry: Geena Davis

100dolrs.wav You okay? Fletch: Feel like a hundred dollars.

5-10mins.wav Gail: Could you love someone who looked like that? Fletch: What are you talking about? No. Five… ten minutes tops.

alfgarc.wav Fletch: Never mind. Just get me a glass of hot fat. And bring me the head of Alfredo Garcia while you’re out there.

allears-fletch.wav Alan: Here’s my proposition. Fletch: I’m all ears.

ballbearings.wav Fletch: I’m gonna need some pliers, and a set of 30 weight ball bearings. Mechanic1: What? Mechanic2: What the hell do you need ball bearings for? Fletch: C’Mon guys. It’s so simple maybe you need a refresher course. It’s all ball bearings nowadays.

bigspleen.wav Dr: Have you ever seen a spleen that large? Fletch: No… no, not since breakfast.

bldymary.wav Waiter: Would you like some drinks while you wait? I will put it on the Underhill’s bill. Fletch: Yes, I’ll have a bloody mary, a steak sandwich, and a steak sandwich. Waiter: Very good sir.

bopeep.wav Fletch: Does this proposition entail my dressing up as Little Bo Peep?

borrowtowel.wav Gail: I just got out of the shower. Fletch: Yeah. Could I borrow your towel a sec? My car just hit a water buffalo.

caviar.wav Waiter: You would like something to eat or drink senior? Fletch: Actually, I would. Waiter: Charge it to the Underhill’s senior? Fletch: yeah, that’s… that’s right. Do you have any caviar? Waiter: Si senior, beluga, but it is $80 a portion. Fletch: Well, then I’d better just take two portions of that. How’s the lobster thermador? Waiter: I recommend it, senior. Fletch: Good. That’ll be fine. Bring two bottles of Dom Perignon to cabana one and put down $30 for yourself.Waiter: Muchos gracias, senior. Fletch: Nicest place.

clnwins.wav Fletch: Somebody ought to clean these windows. There is a tremendous buildup of gook all over them… look at that.

close2death.wav Fletch: Do you have any idea how close to death I came?

comanche.wav Oh, by the way, what kind of a name is poon? Fletch: Comanche indian.

damnfine.wav Fletch: And a damn fine answer if I do say so my damn self, thank you.

deadbro.wav Fletch: I thought that body was my dead brother. Nurse: Oh! Fletch: It’s okay, but that spleen was the spitting image.

discbusiness.wav Fletch: Well, I don’t like to discuss business on the lanai, come on in.  If you’re wearing rubbers, leave them outside, will you?

doncorleon.wav Who are you? Fletch: I’m Don Corleon.

dropshorts.wav Doctor: Drop your shorts and bend over, Mr. Babar.

dr-rosen.wav Fletch: Oh, it’s me Dr. Rosenpenis, I’m just here to check out Alan Stanwyck’s file. Nurse: Dr. who? Fletch: Dr. Rosenrosen, I’m here to get in the records room. Nurse: Come again? Fletch: It’s Dr. Rosen, Hi. I just want to check the records room. Nurse: Dr. who? Fletch: Dr. Rosen.

dynastylast10.wav Fletch: Oh, looks like you two have lots to talk over. We’ll just catch the last 10 minutes of Dynasty.

extra1k.wav Fletch: For an extra grand, I’ll let you take me out to dinner.

fletch.wav Fletch: fletch.

forward.wav Gail: Are you always this forward? Fletch: Only with married, wet women.

gdwing.wav Fletch: Ah, that’s a terrific wing. I love this shape.

gimmeprint.wav Fletch: Give me something I can print.

go2gym.wav Fletch: Why don’t you guys go down to the gym and pump each other.

goddogdog.wav Fletch: Aw, for God dog dog.

gohome-fletch.wav Alan: I said I’ll take care of this, now it doesn’t involve you. Now, go on home. I’ll call you tomorrow.

gracias.wav Muchos gracias. Fletch: Senior del Fuego.

hopalong.wav Fletch: What a coincidence. Alan: What? Fletch: I came this close to buying this place, then I found out Hopalong Cassidy killed himself here – blew it for me. Alan: Who? Fletch: Hopalong Cassidy… bow and arrow… very weird.

hostile.wav Fletch: That’s a pretty hostile thing to do, don’t you think?

howgray.wav Fletch: Well, there we’re in a kind-of gray area. Frank: Alright. How gray? Fletch: charcoal?

hstruman.wav Fletch: Hi there, I’m Harry S. Truman from Casewell Insurance Underwriters.

igorstrav.wav Fletch: My name is Igor Stavinski.

ihatetl.wav Fletch: Hey, you and Tommy Lasorda. [yeah] I hate Tommy Lasorda.

ilikemen.wav Karlin: Why are you doing this, Mr. Fletch? Fletch: I like men. I like to be manhandled… I like you.

imjohn.wav Fletch: I’m John.

inutah.wav Fletch: The reason I was asking about Alan is that I bumped into him this morning, and you know what I can’t figure out? Gail: Alan’s in Utah. Fletch: I can’t figure out what I was doing in Utah this morning.

jhcoaps.wav Jesus H Christ on a popsicle stick.

keep10bucks.wav

liddy.wav

luvurbody.wav

madeitup.wav

makemyday.wav

matpolice.wav

moonrivr.wav

mr-s.wav

names.wav A spliced-together sound bite of Fletch saying all the different names he uses in the movie… including his real name.

newdeod.wav

next24hrs.wav

nocure.wav

nothnwrong.wav

notirwin.wav

notshower.wav

nugent.wav

obsruling.wav

oddcombo.wav

orderedlunch.wav

otbdeadline.wav

peakid.wav

realname.wav

remodgarage.wav

richwoman.wav

ruacop.wav

rubgloves.wav

sayflesh.wav

scavhunt.wav

servtime.wav

smogptrl.wav

syph.wav

taco.wav

theme-fletch.wav

themrs.wav

thepolice.wav

thrsfred.wav

trembhills.wav

try2quit.wav

twobs.wav

urinalysis.wav

violation.wav

waivrights.wav

wardrbchange.wav

whatlitbe.wav

whoops_fletch.wav

whosfreda.wav

whtalbum.wav

whthellmatter.wav

wronggal.wav

xcuseu.wav